Sunday, June 14, 2009

Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man by Steve Harvey

.....Great stuff! I know much of what he said should be common sense for every grown woman.He really put his brain to work on that one. Much of which I already knew, but I got a much better understanding of some things that had me stumped at times. But here are what I feel were the most important and useful points of the book (in my cliffnotes version, lol)

**To women "Unless a man feels like he has established himself as a man, he's not going to establish you as his woman". If he's really the one you want to be with, sit your ass down until it's your turn! Don't try to force him into anything because he'll resent you for it, and honestly, if he's a real man, he won't stand for it. Get a man with goals, short-term and long-term. If he doesn't even have his short-term figured out ain't NO WAY you're going to be incorporated into his long-term.

**Men are simple creatures. Minimalists that thrive off of basic male necessities. Ladies, you know how you say the smallest things make you happy? The same thing goes for him! As Dave Chappelle says, "Make him a sandwich, play with his balls, and don't talk so much!" Ladies I'm just kidding, not.

However, I must also add that just because you want a man with goals and a plan doesn't mean jump on the first man that comes along! Ladies set your standards high and expect the man you want to reach for the bar and go above and beyond. You have all got too much going for ourselves to settle for less than the best.

I cannot and will not get into all that he had to say but he did indeed give me validation and why I don't regret being single since 2004. Some women just aren't ready for it! LOL (but no seriously), this has also given me time to grow and mature as man into the person I want myself to quote (don't judge me) Souljah Boy: "Be yourself, everybody else is already taken."

Seriously though ladies, it's a good read! It's not a man telling you how to live your life, it's a man offering some insight to a man's mind and how to handle certain situations. You're not obligated to take his advice. But don't say you weren't warned when he takes your cookie and runs. Leaving you wondering why his phone number don't work.

Sunday, June 7, 2009

Hip Hop the African American's Experience

"Don't think about commin up think about dummin up".... Kinda sounds like Ice Cubes from the Eighties. This man one of the architects of "Gangsta Rap" has grown and matured into a movies maker of quality family movies, why can't we. As a matter of fact we done started dummin up.

The Black man, the Italian, and the Irish, have something in common, racism. Except they new that you will not be given anything your must take what you want. Let take a look at the Italian man coming from distant shore landing at Ellis Island being processed in sometime 1n th late 1890's and early 1900's. He looked white, yes he had fair skin and straight hair and if he did not to open his mouth, he could pass as born on these shores to parents from whose ancestors came on the Mayflower, Pinta or Santa Maria. But as soon as he open his mouth and his thick Italian accent came out he experienced racism. Maybe he was not hanged but he experienced economical racism, maybe not as shocking but just as painful. A father knowing that he is being kept from earning a living and providing for his family. He was not given the ability to get a city job, corporate job or dishwasher unless he had no competion for the job by a secondary native (white man), the primary native of America being the native american.. The Irish man also had the same skin complexion, same hair except sometimes his was red. But again when he opened his mouth it was clear that he was not a descendant of those who came on the Mayflower. He also experienced the same economic discrimination. Now what they did understand from their experiences from across the water in their homeland was that if you want something you must do whatever is necessary to get it.

Italians the Mafia and Irish the Boston Mob who have suffered the stigma of the criminal element but with their ill gotten gains they sent the sons and daughters to private schools, joined country clubs and cleaned up themselves and their grandsons and daughters have doctors, lawyers, mayors, senators and govenors. They thought about "commin up not dummin up". The Irish of Boston hired the own political leaders, secured every job in city government that was a hiring position and hired their own, to make sure that every Irsihman in Boston could make a good living for their families.

As a teacher in the public school system I so not see the children of the crack dealer, the pimp or any underworld figure comin up just the children of the poor dummin up. We must get some political power in our community and use it pull our people up. We must not live the "crab in the bucket" syndrome.

Mothers we must go back to raisng our children with strict standards of our grand parents and discipline children with the understanding and not emotional sentiment. Base the severity of the punishment on the wrong act displayed not on having a pretty child. Talk to your grandparents about how they were brought and lets go back to that. The time of all this superficial nonsense is past and understanding is needed. Malcom X said that Black women are the mothers of our race. Men we need to step up and give the game to our women. Make sure that they know what is important to us as a people for our up and commin like "George Jeffrerson".